| My grandma died.
I'm going to Indiana next week. |   |
| a cat came drifting onto my porch from the outside cold
and with eyes closed, drinking warm milk from my bowl,
thought:
"nobody hears me!
I crept in so soft!
and nobody sees me!"
as I watched six steps off
like the peacocks wandering the walkways of the zoo
wo have twice the autonomy the giraffes and the tigers do,
saying:
"no one can stop me,
no one clips my claws!
now everyone watch me
scale these outside walls!"
you took the puous and profane,
turned around the praise and blame,
"a glass can only spill what it contains"
To the perpetually plain and the incurably inane
a glass can only spill what it contains
what new mystery is this?
what blessed backwardness??
the Immeasurable One is held and does not resist!
struck by wicked words and foolish fists of senseless men
the Almighty One does not defend!
I was halfway listening to what she thinks she knows
We're like children dressing in our parents' clothes, saying:
"Nobody knows me,
no one knows my name,
No, nobody knows me..."
I half-heartedly explained
but gave up peacefully ashamed
as a glass can only spill what it contains
we went to Portugal and Spain
and in her mind the entire time it rained!
a glass can only spill what it contains
what new mystery is this? in overflowing emptiness
the Invisible is seen among the shadows and the mist,
before my doubting eyes the Infinite appears in time-
the Unquestionable is questioned but makes no reply!
what new mystery is this?!
"my Rabbi!"
my lips betray with a kiss
what new mystery is this? | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| we took the twine we used to use
to tie up tight our tattered shoes
twisted twigs and crooked cross
a necklace for the deeply lost
Builder with the broken bricks
Mother to the baby chicks
You made this world to look so nice
I wonder what the next one's like?
yellow spider,
yellow leaf
confirms my deepest held belief | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| It's the smell of hot summertime trash,
it's the city noise of a busy street
it's a train derailed and two car head on freeway crash
each time we meet
"and if it comes as some sort of surprise," she said
"that I seem so composed,
I've kept this moment closer to my eyes," she said,
"than the glasses resting on the edge of my nose."
shadow am I!
a question of a person, no said reply
wolf am I!
and shadow cast on the sheep as I pass by
shadow am I, or like a
wearing-black-socks-and-white-woolen-locks
wolf am I, and shadow.
she was grace and green as a stem,
but I walk heavy on delicate ground
(((...as I go showing off again,self impressed by how well I can put myself down!!
and then go again, to the next further removed level
of that same exact feigned humility!!!)))
[this for me goes on and on to the point of nausea]
shadow am I!
like suspicion that's never confirmed
but it's never denied
Wolf am I!
(((no, "shadow" I think is better,
as I'm not so much something as the absence of something)))
So SHADOW AM I!
the material world seems to me like a newspaper headline-
it explicitly demands your attention
and it may even contain some truth
and what's really going on here?
one day the water's gonna wash it away
and on that day, nothing clever to say. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| first came a strong wind,
ripping off rooftops like bottlecaps
and bending lampposts down to the ground
then came a thunder shattering my windows
but you were not that strong wind or that might sound
that left the barn in shambles, the rabbit hutch in ruins
the split-rail fence splintered and the curtains torn,
all the cows out from the pastures trampling on the pumpkins
and the horses from their stables ambling in the corn
Isa ruhu-lah 'alaihis-salat was-salam
I've flown unnoticed just behind you like an insect
and I've watched you like a falcon from a distance as you passed
then swooped down to be nearer to the traces of your footsteps
to pick the fallen grain from the dirt beneath the crooked grass
and I'm gonna take that grain and I'm gonna crush it all together
into the flour of a bread as small and simple and sincere
as when the dryness and the rain finally drink from one another
the gentle cup of mutual surrender tears
A fish swims through the sea,
while the sea is in a certain sense
contained within the fish!
Ah, what am I to think
of what the writing of a thousand lifetimes
could not explain
if all the forest trees were pens
and all the oceans ink?
nastagh-firuka ya Hokan
ya Dhal-Jalah wal-Ikram
Isa ruhu-lah 'alaihis-salat was-salam
ya Halim, ya Qahhar
ya Muntaqim, ya Ghaffar!
la Ilaha ilallahu, Allahu Akbar!
(((the arabic translates as:
The chorus:
Jesus, peace be upon him
The end part:
Ask forgiveness from God
The Majestic, Compassionate
Jesus peace be upon him
The Forbearing, the Subduer
The Lord of Retribution (The Avenger), The Forgiver
There is no God but God, God is the Greatest!))) | | comments: Leave a comment |
| "I do not exist,"
we faithfully insist
sailing in our separate ships,
and in each tiny caravel-
tiring of trying, there's a necessary dying
like the horseshoe crab in its proper season sheds its shell
such distance from our friends,
like a scratch across a lens,
made everything look wrong from anywhere we stood
and our paper blew away before we'd left the bay
so half-blind we wrote these songs on sheets of salty wood
you caught me making eyes at the other boatmen's wives
and heard me laughing louder at the jokes told by their daughters
I'd set my course for land,
but you well understand
it takes a steady hand to navigate adulturous waters
the propeller's spinning blades held acquaintance with the waves
as there's mistakes I've made no rowing could outrun
the cloth low on the mast like to say I've got no past
but I'm nonetheless the librarian and secretary's son
with tarnish on my brass and mildew on my glass
I'd never want someone so crass as to want someone like me
but a few leagues off the shore, I bit a flashing lure
and I assure you, it was not what it expected it to be!
I still taste its kidd, that dull hook in my lip
is a memory as useless as a rod without a reel
to an anchor-ever-dropped-seasick-yet-still-docked
captain spotted napping with his first mate at the wheel
floating forgetfully along, with no need to be strong
we keep our confessions long and when we pray we keep it short
I drank a thimbleful of fire and I'm not ever going back
Oh, my G-d!
"I do not exist," we faithfully insist
while watching sink the heavy ship of everything we knew
if ever you come near I'll hold up high a mirror
Lord, I could never show You anything as beautiful as You
---
I
do
not
exist
only
YOU
exist | | comments: Leave a comment |
| PARK DAY
WHEN: SATURDAY, JULY 8TH. MAYBE 2:00ish - LATEISH.
WHERE: HARRY GRIFFEN PARK. (THE BIG PARK NEXT TO GROSSMONT HIGH SCHOOL.)
WHAT TO BRING: YO' SELF & TONS O' FUN. [AND MAYBE SOME CHIPS AND DRINKS IF YOU WANT TO HELP OUT.]
I'M GONNA TRY AND BRING SOME BURGERS & HOT DOGS, BUT I KIND OF SUCK AT GRILLING.
THERE'LL BE FUN & GAMES. | | comments: 2 comments or Leave a comment |
| I hereby decree Monday, July the Third, Park Day.
edit on July 2nd: Park Day is canceled! It's been postponed to a later, unknown date. | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| |
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captainajax's journal
